Everybody makes mistakes from time to time. Back when my heart was beating and blood pumped through my veins I sometimes scored an own goal or two. However, I always managed to make amends. The petrol station bouquet, the two quid bottle of Lambrini and discount box of Matchmakers always managed to turn things around. And judging by his team’s performances in their last three games, Sunderland boss Steve Bruce has also mastered the art of getting himself out of trouble. After taking more of a beating than their gaffer’s nose at St. James Park a fortnight ago, the Mackems have claimed seven points from nine, including a spectacular 3-0 win at Stamford Bridge last Sunday. After such a shock result, In Off the Ghost decided to talk to a man who also knows a thing or two about great performances at the bridge, pioneering civil engineer Isambard Kingdom Brunel!
“Of all the wonderful feats Bruce has performed since he has been in this part of the world, I think Sunday he performed most wonderfully. He produced unanimity among eleven men who were all rubbish against Newcastle” boomed Brunel, his translucent top hat teetering perilously on his ethereal noggin.
“He engineered a victory that will live as long in the memory as my Great Western Railway bridges. Sunderland’s season seemed to have gone off the rails after the Newcastle game, but they have returned to form and demolished the champions on their own patch. The team are constructed using a similar blueprint to Bruce’s Wigan and Birmingham City teams. With quality players like Jordan Henderson being the architect of some fine passing play and Asamoah Gyan using his industry to gain access to the previously unreachable territories behind Chelsea’s back four, this Sunderland side are starting to build a reputation for themselves.”
I asked Brunel how important he thought the victory would be for Steve Bruce’s side. He chomped on his macabre cigar thoughtfully before replying:
“It is difficult to gauge the significance of this result for the Black Cats, but hopefully it will be the platform that Sunderland need to make inroads towards Europe. At the very least it is clear that recent results have gone some way to help Bruce build some bridges with the Sunderland faithful.”
(All material in this blog is entirely fictional and does not represent the views or opinions of anyone, alive or dead, other than those of the author)